Struggling With Anxiety

14 comments

The last few weeks I’ve been in a bit of a funk. My husband asks if I am OK and I say, “Yes, just tired. Just feeling unmotivated and a little discouraged.” But then when we were talking last night I felt unwanted tears welling in my eyes. I don’t cry very often. I hate crying.

I have been feeling a multitude of emotions and experiencing a roller-coaster of thoughts the last few weeks. This is my life with anxiety. It causes me to avoid instead of confront. It causes me to ghost out on my friends and family. It makes me doubt myself very much. My writing. My parenting. My goals. My health. My day to day activities.

It’s not secret I struggle with anxiety. Usually I manage it pretty well, but now and again I hit a rough patch and everything spirals from there. I don’t know what causes these patches. It can be triggered by a small event, something someone does or says, or even just getting in my own head too much.

I was watching a Facebook live video that my cousin did the other day and she opened up about how she is struggling with anxiety lately. She posts live videos all the time and she is fun, bubbly, loving, and someone I really admire. I noticed she wasn’t posting videos for awhile, but I didn’t know the reason was because she was struggling with her anxiety. Her opening up about it really resonated with my own experience and I think more people struggle with it than they like to admit. Even people we admire are not immune.

I am still learning about what triggers me and how to handle it. I know anxiety can look different for everyone but these are a few examples of what it looks like for me:

-I hyper focus on something to the point that it begins to drain me…which leads to me avoiding it altogether

-I don’t want to leave the house

-I start avoiding people and situations I feel will emotionally drain me

-I begin to question what I’m doing and why I’m here (basically an existential crisis)

-I either stop eating as much or don’t pay attention to when I’ve eaten

These are just a few of the struggles I’ve been facing the last few weeks. I finally am sitting down and writing. Sometimes the best way to get over a slump is to do the thing you have been avoiding.

So here I am. Anxiety and all. Still learning and growing. If you’re still here after my ghosting period then I want to say thank you. I am grateful.

If you struggle with anxiety please reach out and share your own experience. How does it manifest for you? How do you fight it?

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14 comments on “Struggling With Anxiety”

  1. I hope you are well my friend! Anxiety is rough everyone deals with differently. I also tend to want to stay home & work myself into home improvement projects seem to help me deal with mine. Some days are good some days are meh.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh, my dear, I definitely know how you’re feeling. Honestly, there are days when I feel just like this. Sometimes I’ll go to the grocery store and I just can’t even go in because I’m so anxious, I can’t be around that many people.

    Honestly, there are some days when I can fight in and some days when I just can’t. I think that’s true of anyone though. You know when it’s bad and you know when it’s really, really bad!

    For me, I’ve been taking medication for my anxiety. And it helps a lot. I don’t know if that’s something you would want to do or would ever consider, but I just put it out there because honestly, I had a hard time getting through each day before i started taking it. And honestly, I only even considered it after my sister in law and my best friend both told me they took it and I shouldn’t think about there being any stigma around it.

    On the non-medication front – Make sure that you’re getting all your vitamins in. Honestly, B12 deficiency and D deficiency can exacerbate the effects of anxiety. And you definitely don’t want that. It’s a natural means of trying to ensure you’re combatting it as much as you can.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you V for understanding.
      I do take medication. I have been since my youngest was born and it does help. I’m sure I could be taking better care of myself and doing better on the vitamin front. I will try to be more mindful of that.
      ❤️❤️❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I’ve never experienced anything like this, but I am really sorry you are going through something which affects your life in such a negative way. Sending you my best wishes!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. 😦 I know that must be really hard on top of parenting responsibilities and whatnot. I have anxiety, as you may have noticed on my blog but I have the relative luxury (I guess!) of being single and childless so all my anxiety struggles are just in my own head as long as I show up for work. Man, you’re the second blogger I’ve seen tonight having an anxiety wave tonight and…. all I can say is I float my support toward you and I may even venture to say that I wish you something like prayer. Though the whole Christianity thing is new to me so it’s a newbie / cautious & halting kind of prayer. But it’s there nonetheless.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for that! I appreciate any good thoughts or prayers you send my way!
      I think anxiety is difficult whether you have kids or are single with no kids. Everyone experiences it differently. Thank you for being understanding and for your kind words.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. https://zerospace05.wordpress.com/2019/09/08/golden-abyss-redux/
        I now dedicate that post to *you*. Minus the part where I tossed the meds. That turned out to be dumb as hell. But, just that whole idea of slashing lava that nobody else can see. I am well now… but I will never forget that feeling of alone, and I don’t want to lose this empathy.
        So I went back and re-read and forced myself to remember….for people like you right now. It sucks. Feel better soon. Prayers.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. I have been struggling with anxiety for almost 4-5 years now. Personally. it always attacks when you are least bothered. I have been trying to practise meditation after my workout routine. On some days it does really help. I hope you overcome it soon, friend.

    Liked by 1 person

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